Thursday, November 24, 2011

With Tired Eyes, Tired Minds, Tired Souls, We Slept

Somehow, someway, I always end up going back to this episode. 

The pain and the sadness this character had in his heart is indescribable. If it came around again, I'd be able to identify it.

Once upon a time, I was like him. I felt invisible. I felt alone. Even when I had crowds of people around. The loneliness was unbearable.

I had a class writing collage to write when I was in undergrad. I hated my professor for pushing me so hard to write better. And in the end, she got her way and I cried as I typed that collage and said what I knew was real. Showed her and (in my mind) the world what this pain and sadness was. And I did a pretty kick ass job. And it exposed the best part of me. The vulnerable part. The secretive part. The broken part.

Unfortunately, some of the people closest to me don't even know these parts of me. Not even my mother. And I think in this New Year coming, I will reveal these indescribable feelings to help others. This is the main reason why I decided I would keep writing. My words have to affect someone, Right? Well I hope so. And it never hurts to try. Just hurts when you don't.

With my eyes, I got tired, my mind wept, my soul weary and I fell asleep.  Now I'm awake, my mind at rest, soul empowered, and bed made.